May 30, 2025

Writing from Baler.  I remember I once wanted to be here but since I left an old set of friends, I wasn't able to be with them on that trip possibly 10 years ago. Fast forward to today, I was able to drive here with the church friends I've been hanging out with since around August of last year. God has provided new set of friends to whom I can join some travels with.

Indeed, God's way are marvelous. We just have to stay with Him to see what He's going to do. Even if it means, staying just where we are. Same church, same people you are with--different seasons. 

I was reminded of this when in this morning's drive, we turned on Preston's The Power of Staying podcast as I told them about Preston. Not sure if they heard everything but since I was driving, I was able to hear the message again. I wanted to write some of the things I think of as what to write but I was driving. 

One particular thing was-- God can make new seasons even if we are staying on the same place for a long time. I have been in the JIL church since college. There have been times I was in the verge of leaving because of past hurts but He still made ways for me to stay. True enough, as I stayed and focused on serving Him, He brought new seasons after seasons in my life to which I grew from. Ministry to ministry. Life groups to life groups. People to people. Some managed to stay as they were and continued to grow--like my Socmed ministry, and friends who stayed, and new ones to whom my life has been enriched and blessed with.

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I am still working on the flaws and weaknesses I have. I am staying where I am, trusting that He can change me from glory to glory. Hindi ko naisip lumayo dahil lagi kong iniisip, where can I go Lord? You have the words of eternal life (John 6:68). I need Him all the more now. 

Today I am meditating Psalm 119:9-16.

How can a young person stay on the path of purity?
    By living according to your word.
10 I seek you with all my heart;
    do not let me stray from your commands.
11 I have hidden your word in my heart
    that I might not sin against you.
12 Praise be to you, Lord;
    teach me your decrees.
13 With my lips I recount
    all the laws that come from your mouth.
14 I rejoice in following your statutes
    as one rejoices in great riches.
15 I meditate on your precepts
    and consider your ways.
16 I delight in your decrees;
    I will not neglect your word.

May 17, 2025

Uploading photos from last Sunday. I am thinking to write something here while waiting the uploads to finish. 

I am almost done with my data gathering, just 10 more respondents and hopefully, I could write the next and final chapters of my thesis. 

It is good to find comforting words from the scripture that says do not be anxious, don't be too stressed. I thank the Lord also for bringing me people who help me in so many ways. Really they have come for such a time as this. I acknowledge His goodness in my life.

Phototeam's also gearing up for the many JILWC events and I am humbled to be part of it. 

Thinking of something to share here. I was scrolling my IG feeds when I bumped into one of my favorite communicators, Jeff Fisher. He shared about how people should be a well, not a waterfall.In our conversations, we must be well where people could draw water from, not a waterfall who says a lot of things and without control (based on my perspective). A well where your words are asked upon, not a waterfall to a point of oversharing. That's how I think people become mysterious with other people. 

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I am still far from perfect, I have a lot of flaws-- some even to the point I need to battle them in prayers and be disciplined to. One thing I know, He is good and gracious in the things I am limited and weak to. He can do the impossible, and I can trust Him with the things that need to be changed in my life-- for His glory.

May 08, 2025

The past days were busy with data gathering that I hardly have no time left for other things like writing here. 

I was able to get up early today. After trying to sleep again and failed, I decided to get up early and put into words my thoughts. I am writing some things on my notes (on specific things that happened) but gathering up my thoughts here to express them in a more general sense.

From the past months of being sober, my head is getting better and clearer. I can even now process my emotions and come to a point of being able to analyze them and validate them. 

Not that I can do them myself alone, it must have some circumstances for which in life are inevitable that pushes me to understand them and give me reasons to grow from it. There must be someone or something that makes you feel vulnerable with so you can navigate them. 

When I was working for a security group, we have this framework for why a fire happens. Hindi ito magandang example but a fire happens because of these three factors:

The fire triangle, a model explaining what's needed for a fire, consists of three key elements: heat, fuel, and oxygen. If any of these elements are removed, the fire will extinguish. 

For something to happen and grasp, there must be elements. In order for me to grow, there must be a circumstance, emotions that goes with it, and something or someone. This goes also how to extinguish things like negative emotions (which is on a different view on this.

A big factor in my processing of things is the fact that I am a spiritual person in need of His grace to help me understand them. 

The verse last night which I remember to ponder was Ephesians 4:2-4 which says 

2 Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. 3 Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. 4 There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called;

In all the things that I need to understand and process, I need to be completely (not partially) be humble and gentle, to be patient and bearing another in love, as I also bear myself with love and grace. Dapat sa akin palang, maging mas gentle na ako, patient with myself, and to love the life He has given me. From there, I will be able to do so with others. 

I am far from perfect, I still perceive things differently from others--and maybe, I still need to work on not just looking at my points but to others as well. Since I am taking up Masters in Communication, it maybe good to use the theories, and learn to use the theories I haven't explored, for me to understand things. A theory I was checking on last night was Communication Perception Theory:

Communication Perception Theory explains how our individual ways of perceiving the world, influenced by factors like background, beliefs, and experiences, shape how we communicate and interpret messages. This theory highlights that the same information can be understood differently by various people due to their unique perceptual frameworks. 

Another is Constructivist Theory pero mas fitting yung CPT.

I thank God for the people He brings me to navigate these things with me, and to use the things I have learned so I can apply them to others within, and beyond, my circle as well.