I have been keeping myself subtle on some issues because I know myself. Yet it doesn't stop because some people doesn't stop telling other people about the lie. When it hit me hard on a desired post, I wanted to rage. I kept myself calm and sane in the thoughts about Him who has called me for His purpose.
I cannot tell you how much patience and endurance He is giving me in dealing this suffering. How much love and support I receive from people. How painful it feels to be brushed for wrong causes and be put to shame. I bear the scar I trust people with only to be misinterpreted and betrayed.
I cry every time. I moan in my sleep. I sigh in my prayers. I give Him my anger that's been building up. I try to meditate His Word He gives that I feel so insane to even accept. Offer another cheek? Bless the ones who hurt you? Love? Stay?
I can just go and start a new life. I don't have to prove them wrong anyway but for now, I know that there's no way but through it. I shall claim what Job said, I shall come forth as gold.
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