21 April 2016 On the Wait to What

I started working when I was in high school. I work for my parent's grocery and would get 100 pesos for a 12-hour duty being a cashier and helping in the computation. In college, I use my vacation time doing summer jobs and before I finish college, I already have a job as technical support in ePLDT. Everytime I pursue a new job, I would have three days to two weeks vacation only before embarking the new career.

There would always be a backup plan and because of His grace, the Lord has always provided new jobs even without having to seek.

It is one thing to be strong, another thing that your strength be tested. Before I hit another decade, I have wanted to work abroad, not to stay for long but to see what's out there. During the time of stay, numerous times I encountered how to wait. And with waiting, another thing is to wait without assurance (that's faith). It is somehow relieving to wait when you know you are waiting for something but to wait for uncertainties will require much more than planning each day's list of to dos and goals.

To be honest, waiting for uncertain things is really testing my steadfastness and patience. I know myself that when a plan (which I have carefully checked and prayed about) doesn't happen, I get uneasy. My nerves would like to break off and I become fidgety. I very know of that as it happened with my sister, my friends, and family. Coming to think of it, it might be because during my childhood, my family would always plan on going out, and at the last minute, it does not happen. I find myself not talking for the next hours to next days just because things doesn't go as planned. It happens countless times that I developed silent anxieties as with planning and going. All this has been surrendered to God and I thank Him for the grace which is like an infinity pool I swim to.

The first three months of trying to seek a job abroad, we would stay inside the flat looking for opportunities online (yes, application online is the best possible way)-- I had to wait. When I got the interviews, I had to fast for the job I liked (which well God has greater plans why I wasn't able to get that), and upon exit for residence visa, I had to wait again (without certain date when the visa will be released). During the months of staying-- I waited til I turn one year and finish off some goals.

Two days before the flight, the plan to go home was cancelled indefinitely. I knew that everything in the past had come to test me and my patience. Everything has been set. It has been planned (coupled with prayers). Surely, this is a delay and I had to wait for completion of papers despite all the days of previous waiting.

The powerful thing that happened is that God has provided the extension of my patience. I knew I could flare up. I admit, I still feel the disappointment as this has been talked about and raised two months before. I couldn't even believe that I told them I understand it perfectly as it happened, it is beyond their control, while at the back of my mind, I knew there were faults. I have set aside concerns and focus on the great things that God can do in my days of waiting. I know I have tendencies to take matters at hand but this time, I just let some things go out of my control which was painstakingly relieving. I know I am a work in progress and growing to maturity.

The emphasis of the waiting, in most contexts where the words for waiting occur, is on the impact waiting on the Lord’s return should have on our daily walk. The waiting in the bible actually points to our waiting in the Lord for His coming and its importance on daily walk. The little waitings in our lives (waiting to finish school, waiting for land a job, waiting in line, waiting for celebrations and many waitings we can think of) are but preparation to how we should wait upon the Lord. Not solely by our own strength, not by our power, not with the gritting of teeth but waiting with hope and love, waiting joyfully, waiting patiently.

Psalm 27:14 Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!
and yes, there is a  promise for those who wait for the Lord -- He will renew their strength. (Isaiah 40:31), Talk about command but with promise. The main objective and focus in our lives is that when we get the understanding on the waiting for the Lord, the waiting on other small things (that sometimes overwhelms us as we become out of focus, letting it be magnified big) in our lives will become easier as it should be.